So here’s as much as I can post of my book (what i have so far) and I like it, only I can’t think of a title. Read it and tell me any title ideas u may have: I shared a room with three girls. Three preppy, snooty, sixteen year old girls. I, on the other hand, am fifteen, have rarely been seen with my hair in anything but two low braids, and still haven’t worn makeup…ever. Can you imagine a worse situation?
So here’s the rundown of my giant family. There’s Mom, Dad, Max, Luke, Blake, Nick, Lizzie, Claire, Alice, and me: Sarah. Max’s 17 and hates me. Blake’s 16 and barely knows me. Luke’s 12 and is going through this weird gothic faze. Nick’s my age, and my twin. And of course, as I mentioned earlier, Lizzie, Claire, and Alice are sixteen. Being the oldest children in our family and triplets nonetheless seemed to give them the impression that they ruled the house. And technically…they did.
“Sarah!”Lizzie yelled, launching a flipflop at my head from across the room,“Nose out of the book!”
I slammed the thin red paperback shut and threw it on my desk. “What do you want?”
She looked up at me, screwed the cap back on her mascara, and smiled sweetly. “You know if you read too much your eyes won’t look as wide. It really messes up your face you know.”
“I literally have no idea what you just said,”I glared, and swung my legs off my bed before getting up and walking across the room towards the hall.
“Going anywhere?” Claire said, coming out of the bathroom and blocking my path to the door.
“Yeah,” I replied, and shoved past her and out into the hallway before going down a flight of steps and arriving at the door to Nick’s room.
Now I’m not sure how he ended up with his own room, but I’m sure Mom has some reason.
“Nick!!” I yelled, rapping sharply on the door, “I’m coming in!”
The door swung open and he stood in the doorway, leaning against its frame.
“What’s up?”he asked casualy, giving his shaggy blond hair a toss and letting me in.
“I’m going to kill my sisters,” I told him, taking a seat on the bed. It was large and wooden, with a thick blue duvet and fluffy white pillows. Max, Luke, and Blake had really taken to calling it the“Chick Bed”.
“Why?” he asked, going over to that weird home gym thing that people hang on their doors and lifting himself up and down.
“Um…Because they’re airheads, they have no lives, and they hate me,” I replied, sucking on the end of my braid.
“Oh really,” Nick failed to console me, jumping off the thingy and sitting down against the door.
“Yes really!” I said loudly, dropping the braid from my mouth.
He said nothing, just flexed his muscles.
“Stop doing that,” I told him.
“Doing what?” he asked.
“That thing with your muscles! It’s gross!”
“Why??”
“Um….let’s think….maybe because I’m your sister and that’s the highly seductive motion I see you using all the time with Allie!”
Allie was his girlfriend, and she was beautiful. She had long, silky brown hair and the brightest blue eyes you’ve ever seen. She was like a nicer Claire, Lizzie, or Alice.
Nick folded his arms, “Mmm…true.”
Alice swung the door open suddenly, hitting Nick in the back.
He swore loudly and hopped up.
“God Alice! What was that about?!?!” he yelled at her, rubbing his shoulders.
“Sorry,”Alice said quickly, crossing the room and picking me up, “But I need Sarah.”
Alice was a cheerleader. Actually, she was cheer captain, which made her an object of wisdom for Lizzie and Claire. But point being she’s pretty darn ripped under all that silk and cash-me-your or something like that that she was always talking about.
“AAAAHHH!” I screamed, kicking her as she dragged me along, “PUT ME DOWN!!!!!”
Well guess what. She didn’t. She dragged me all the way back to our room, where the others were waiting.
She plopped me down on my bed.
“Okay,” I said, my throat hoarse from screaming at Alice, “What do you want from me?”
Lizzie propped my chin up with one finger and said innocently, “Why so bitter? We’re just giving you something of a makeover!”
I rolled my eyes. “Wowwww…you guys are stupider than I thought.”
“Yeah,” added Claire, “Those braids really have you in a rut.”
“And you really need contacts, too,”chimed in Alice.
“Why?” I asked, “I can see just fine!”
“Not for seeing, stupid,” Alice reprimanded me, whacking me acros the head, “Remember? Your eyes are gray.”
I liked my eyes, personally. I mean, I’m not the most beautiful girl in the world, but I do pretty well. My shiny blond hair is long and smooth, and when they’re tucked out from under my pretty blue headband they look really nice! My eyes are kind of a sparkly gray…like…silverish. And for not wearing anyy mascara my eyelashes are really long! Oh crap…I’m sounding like one of them.
The door burst open and Nick stood in the door way, surveying the scene.
“Ladies,” he saluted us casually.
“What do
ok so it cut off early so heres the next part right from where it stopped: you want Nick?”Lizzie asked, “Say it fast or don’t say it all. We’re short on time and giving Sarah a makeover.”
“I’m gonna need Sarah,” he said, glancing at me.
I bowed down to him, my hands clasped in prayer.
“Well you can’t have her,” Alice corrected him, trying to push him out the door.
He grabbed her wrist and was about to do one of those weird karate things when she grinned at him.
“You can’t hurt a girl!” she smiled, thinking she had won.
“What are you talking about?” he asked, “You’re my sister, remember? It’s my job to hurt you.”
Nick released her sharply, and crossed to my bed before slinging my over his shoulder.
“I can walk!!!” I reminded him.
“True,” he conceded, “But it’s funner this way!”
“More fun,” I corrected him.
“Nose out of the books grammer girl,” he grinned, but set me down and I crossed the hall to his room.
“Where ya going?” he asked.
“Your room. Where are you going?”
“I’m not going a
it did it again so imm just gonna keep adding more here’s the next part: nywhere,” he told me, “We’re going outside.”
When we were outside, sitting on the lawn and basking in the warm summer sun, I remembered.
“Holy crap!” I yelled, jumping up.
“What?!?!” he asked, startled.
“I’m meeting Conrad at the movies in an hour and I completely forgot!!!” I screamed at him.
“Are you planning on….combing your hair or something?” he asked me.
“Um duh!!!” I replied, running inside.
“Make sure to get the bugs out from behind your ears!” he reminded me jokingly as I ran up to my room.
Luckily, the other three had left the area, and I was free to half-prep (their name for what I do when I want to look at all nice) in peace.
I washed and brushed my hair, changed into a pair of white jean brermuda shorts, a blue tanktop, and Lizzie’s hip length, shiny white rain coat with the four buttons down the top, the high collar and the waist band. I put new blue ribbons in my braids and slipped on a pair
of blue rain boots. No makeup, no high heels….Lizzie would be ashamed of me.
I stomped downstairs.
“Mom!!” I yelled.
No answer.
“MOM!” I yelled again. I needed her to drive me to the movies!
Alice came around the corner, smiling widely.
“Mom’s not home,” she told me silkily.
“Oh come on!!!” I yelled angrily.
“But..I can drive,” she grinned.
I shrank.
“Really, Alice?!!”I asked her, “You’d drive me?”
“Sure I’d drive you!” she smiled, “All I’d need is a little teensy favor.”
I whacked my head against the wall, “Never mind! I’ll ask Blake.”
I stomped up the stairs and threw open the door to Max, Luke, and Blake’s room.
“Hey little sis,” Blake said from where he sat on the bed with his guitar.
Luke was painting his nails black from the desk in the corner and Max was wrapping a tape measurer around his muscles from the top bunk of the bed he shared with Blake.
Boys in my family are so weird.
“My name’s Sarah,” I reminded him, “And I need you to drive me to the movies.”
“Ask Mom,” he tol
d me.
“She’s at the store,” I replied.
“Ask Dad,”he suggested.
“He’s at a meeting.”
“Ugh,” he said, “Fine.”
He got up, pulled on an old blue shirt and sandals, grabbed his keys off the desk, and followed me down to the car.
Max made a loud fart noise as I left.
“Shut up!” I yelled at him, but got into the car with Blake anyways.
I met Conrad at the door to the theatre, and we kissed briefly before heading inside. He’s the hottest guy you’ve ever met, with sandy blond hair that falls to his cheek bones and soft brown eyes. Oh, and if that’s not enough…he’s nice!
We held hands through the movie, which turned out to be a really stupid thing to do.
A loud giggle echoed from the row behind us. Now, since we were at the movies this would generally be normal, except for the fact that the hero of the movie had just died.
I turned around, and squinted into the dark. I couldn’t see anything.
Squeaky kissing noises came through the blackness, and the screen flashes white long enough for
me to see the derogatory faces of my three sisters, grinning from their seats.
“OH MY GOD!!!” I screamed, standing up and shaking my fist, “WHY THE HONKY ARE YOU THREE HERE?!?!?!?!”
I heard someone call the theatre assistant, but I didn’t care.
“GET OUT OF HERE!!!!!! I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU SHOWED UP HERE!!!!”
I felt a hand on my arm.
“Dude,” the assitant said, taking my by the arm, “I think you need to leave the movie.”
I glared at him. “Fine! Fine! Kick me out! I don’t care!!!”
He led me out onto the sidewalk, and I slumped on the curb.
“Sorry,” he said, sitting down beside me, “But if I ignore a customer again because the person acting up is hot my boss says I’m fired.”
I looked up and noticed he was about my age.
On his tacky movie assitant uniform was a plasticy white badge with the words “Movie Assitant: Alec” printed in peeling black letters.
“It’s okay,” I sighed, “But I think I just lost my boyfriend for that.”
“That was your boyfriend?” he asked, remembering the guy sitting
next to me.
I nodded. “But he probably thinks I’m crazy right now, so don’t get that too set in your head.”
Alec laughed, and it was a nice laugh. Like bells only more…masculen.
“And who were you screaming at?” he asked, grinning.
“My sisters,” I said bitterly, “Only don’t tell anyone that ’cause generally I like to pretend we’re not related.”
He laughed again. “Do you have a ride home?”
“No,” I replied, “But I can call for one.”
I reached into my back pocket before remembering that it was still at home on the bathroom counter.
“Here,” Alec smiled, handing me his phone from his back pocket, “You can use mine.”
I grinned, thanked him, and dialed in Blake’s cellphone number.
“Yo?” Blake picked up, and I could hear loud music in the background.
“Where are you?” I asked before I could say anything else.
“At Chanelle’s house,” he replied, and I grimaced at the demon’s name. Chanelle was a 17 year old menace, obsessed with short shorts and trashyness. She was the spitting image of Beyo
nce and had a worse reputation in the community than the Adolf Hitler himself. She was knee deep in Jack Daniel and up to her ears in meth.
“You’re at her house?” I asked before I could stop myself.
“Yeah. What do you want and who is this?”
“It’s Sarah and I need a ride home!”I replied angrily.
“Can’t give you one,” he told me, “Call Max.”
“But Max hates me!”I scoffed before I realized he had hung up.
So, despite my problems with Max, I dialed his number in.
“Hey Max,” I said when he had picked up, “It’s Sarah and I need a ride home.”
“No,” he said, and hung up.
I flipped the phone shut and handed it to Alec.
“No luck?” he asked.
“Nope, but thanks anyways.”
“How are you going to get home?” he said.
“I’ll walk, I s’pose.”
“No way,” He told me, “I’ll drive you.”
I was kind of nervous about this, but for some weird reason I trusted him, so we climbed into the obnoxious company car, and he drove me home.
“Thank you so much,” I said gratefuly, climbing out of the car.
“No prob,” he rep
lied, and grabbed a napkin and pen before scribbling some numbers down and handing it to me.
“What’s this?” I asked.
“Call me,” he said, and drove off.
I ran up to the door, and grabbed the key from under the mat. I clicked it into the key hole and ran inside.
Luke was on the couch trying to spike his hair with this weird gel, and the loud booms of Max’s bass guitar shook the house.
Mom stood at the marble counter chopping carrots on a large cutting board.
“Hey honey,” she said, setting down the knife and coming to give me a hug.
“Hey Mom,” I said, hugging her back before going up to my room.
The others hadn’t gotten home yet, and that gave me time to get Nick to help me trash their room.
“What’s up?” Nick asked when I opened the door.
I explained the situation and he grinned before grabbing the bottle of guitar polish off his dresser.
“What’s that gonna do?” I asked him.
“It stains things blueish.”
“Okkkkk??”I asked.
“Just stay in here and I’ll be back in ten minutes.”
When he was
done, I returned for my room and listened to my iPod while waiting for my sisters to come home.
My bed was large and fluffy, with a thin pink knit blanket across the top, a white duvet folded at the bottom, and white pillows almost identical to Nick’s. There were four beds like this, and each of us got one alone with a white wood end table on one side and a matching dresser on the other. There were a couple desks with laptops, pens, and desk stuff lined against the opposite wall. My desk had a thin Macbook, about twenty books, an old apple juice container, a blue piggy bank, a pair of pink sneakers, a stack of laundry I hadn’t put away yet, and a couple of pictures push pinned to the bulletin board. The other desks had fluffy pinks things that resembled feather boas, and no books at all. There were two bathrooms, and I was forced to share with Lizzie. Under my bed were plastic containers filled with stuffed animals, more books, and the socks that didn’t fit in my dresser drawer. On my
end table was an old coffee mug, the thin red paperback book, a desk lamp with one of those things that let you twist it in different directions, and a picture of me and Nick when we were born. In the first drawer of the end table was my baby stuff, and in the bottom drawer was my saxephone stuff. Lesson books, notebooks, polisher, and all sorts of stuff. The saxephone itself sat on the top of my dresser, right above the shirts drawer, which was right above the pants drawer, which was right above the socks drawer, which was right above the skirts/magazine’s drawer. This drawer was rarely used. On my walls were large posters of the Beatles, Charlie Parker, and people like that. Partially ’cause they’re ledgends, and partially ’cause nothing bugs LAC (Lizzie, Alice, Claire) than lame posters.
The door swung open, and they came through giggling. I grabbed my book and ran out of the room and down into the living room.
I plopped down on the couch next to Luke.
He was watching Twilight. I
decided it was between saying something really rude and leaving, so I got up, ran into my room, grabbed my cell without saying a thing, and ran out and down the to basement. In Massechutes they have these things called glass houses, and ours is one of them. Most all the walls are glass with large curtains that can be pulled open or shut, and even the closets are made of them. It’s pretty cool unless you have to go and the curtains won’t stay shut. The only room that isn’t is the basement, and because us kids have spent most all of our lives in our (what we call because so much sun comes through the walls) “sunshine house”we generally avoid the basement (because of its dark nature) unless we have something really private to do.
I grabbed the napkin Alec gave me out of my back pocket and dialed it.
oh and ill email the winner when i decide which one im gonna use
1) Chaos
2) Everything but Sugar and Spice
3) Sugar and Spice and Nothing Very Nice
I couldn’t find any mistakes, and the details! They were simply wonderful, creative, and I could visualize everything. Very, very good. I would definitely buy this if it were a book, although your chapter is only a page and a quarter long. Some of the books I read have some chapters where they’re like three pages. But, if I were you, I would use ‘this’ chapter as the prologue and then chapter two as one.